Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Story # 2.5 How do we go on?

Jay sat, his knees close to his chest and arms draped over them.  He had been in that position for hours now.  He couldn't talk, wouldn't eat, and presumably shouldn't sleep.

All eyes were passively on Jay, as each tried to muttle about while their friend, their colleague, their love sat in solemness by himself.

The kids had long since gone to sleep.  Dana had even crashed on a cot nearby, as had Dr. Blake.  Larry and Linda sat at the table, each taking glances at Jay in the hopes he would begin to show signs of living.

This revelation was almost too much to bear for Jay.  He had contemplated suicide in the moments since, but knew his friends would never allow it.  Nor would Pat or anyone else he assumed at The Fleece.  He was important Pat had told him.  But, Pat had also told him he was a murderer.  How important could a murderer actually be?

Jay took a deep, long sigh, which prompted both Larry and Linda to look up at him from the table.  They were hoping he was finally coming around.  With something like this slapping you in the face, the usually crass Larry had little to say.  No quip could undermind this issue.  Linda was speechless.

How could I have killed her?, Jay thought.

This has to be a dream?  All of this has to be one big, awful dream.  Please God, let it be a dream!  I just can't take this.  I can't take knowing this could be true, is true.  Please God, don't let this be true!

Jay brought his knees up closer to him, and embrace them with his arms tightly.  He was curling himself up into the fetal position as he sat there against the wall.  This brought tears to Linda's eyes, as she looked back down at the table.  She closed her eyes, allowing the drops to hit the reflective surface beneath.  She knew she had been afraid of her husband now for some time, but never really believed he could kill someone.  At least, not her husband.  She believed it had to be his alter ego instead.  But that still doesn't explain how or when Jay, in either form, was in the room with Britton.

"How do I go on", muttered Jay.

Linda and Larry looked at him again.  Their eyes brightened a little, at the thought that Jay might be coming around.

"What did you say, honey?", asked Linda.

Jay looked up from his knees, directly at Linda, "How do I go on from here?"

Linda's jaw began to quiver as she saw the pure sadness on her husband's face.  Tears streamed down her face, as she was unable to answer.

Larry looked down and mumbled, "You get back up."

Linda looked across the table at Larry.  Jay continued to look at Linda.

Larry looked over at his friend, "You just stand up, accept it, and move on."

Linda spoke up, "That's easy to say when you're not the one that was just told..."

"Oh come on, told what?!"

Larry stared at Linda, stopping her midstream.

He looked down at Jay, who was now paying attention to him.

"What have you been told, Jay?  And what proof do you have of that?"

"I had a dream...", Jay replied.

"That's right, a dream", Larry said.  "Just a dream.  People everywhere have dreams like that, and they aren't murderers, nor do they consider themselves such.  Most of them wake up from a dream like that relieved it was in fact a dream.  But it isn't who they are, Jay!"

"This is who I am, Larry."

"Based on what?  What one man says that you hardly know?  That kidnaps you and drags you and everyone you've ever cared about to some blanket plant for all you know, telling you wild stories?  I personally think the meds have messed you up."

"You saw what happened in that room, Larry."

"I don't know what happened in that room, Jay!  No one does."

"How can you deny that?"

"Because there's one obvious possibility.  This is a dream."


"You're still in that room, you're still under sedation.  We've never left and none of this is real."

Jay stared at his friend for a while.

Linda stared at Larry too.

"Jay, I study these kind of things all the time.  I'm a psychologist for Pete's sakes.  This has to be a dream that you have manifested us all in.  It can't be real."

"It is real, Larry."

"If it's real, then test it!"

Jay looked at him again, after looking down at the floor.

"Test if it's real.  Do something to prove you're not sleeping."

"Like what?"

"I don't know?  Pinch yourself."

Jay continued to just stare at Larry.

"Pinch yourself really hard", Larry said.

"Would you please STOP!", demanded Linda.

"Well what else can he do?  It's better than him sitting there having a pity party for another four or five hours", replied Larry.

"Pity party?"

"Yes, I said pity party, Linda!  It's time for Larry to stand up and take this like a man.  If you did kill someone, it's happened, own up to it and move on.  Stop making the whole world stop just for you because you can't take knowing the truth about yourself."

"Stop it!"

"If you want to feel sorry for yourself, then do something about it instead of moping.  Stand up and throw yourself out a window!"


"Throw yourself down the stairs!  Break every bone in your body!  Do something about yourself!  That's why you lost your job!  That's why you're losing your wife!  That's why you're losing your kids!"


Linda was about to come over the table at Larry now.

Jay just continued to listen, his breathing increasing with every word Larry said.

"Let's just own up to the truth here, shall we Jay?  You're a quiter, plain and simple.  You gave up on your family, on your job, on your life, and on ME!"


Jay jumped up to his feet staring at Larry.  Larry and Linda were now fixated on Jay.  Dana and Dr. Blake woke up due to the commotion.

"You want me to do something, I'll do it!", said Jay.

With that, Jay took a running start towards the table, jumping up on it.  He ran across the table, prompting everyone else in the room to jump to their feet.  Jay then dove head first at the window with his arms up to protect his head some.  He dove clean through the glass, shattering it into a million pieces on the floor outside the room.  Jay landed on the floor since the room outside and the room they were in were on the same level.  With blood streaming down from his forehead, Jay jumped back up to his feet and proceeded to run through the white room.  Larry, Linda, and the rest were following very quickly behind.

Some of the nurses and techs were trying to stop Jay, but their efforts were futile.  Jay had a full head of steam and was bent on proving his friend wrong.  He ran faster and faster towards the adjacent wall, as fast as his legs would take him.  Larry was close behind, but was having trouble catching Jay.

Finally, Jay reached the adjacent wall and dove head first again.  As he dove, Jay yelled, "WAKE UP!!!"

With that utterance, Jay crashed into the adjacent wall.  His now limp body fell to the ground in a thud, as he had knocked himself unconscious.  Everyone went down to the ground to check on Jay and make sure he hadn't just killed himself in the process, after slamming into the wall so bluntly.

Jay was still breathing, his heart was still beating.  He was for all intents and purposes asleep now.

Larry looked up from his friend to see Linda hovering over him.  A scowl was draped across her face.  If looks could kill, Larry would already be dead, twice over.  With this event, Larry had to concede a truth they had all just discovered.

"Ok, so maybe this wasn't a dream."

Just then, a hand reached up and grabbed Larry around the throat.  As Larry tried to turn to see who had just grabbed him, he came face to face with a now fully awake Jay, with bright green eyes.  It was Rob, and he wasn't happy.

"You ain't seen nuthin yet, honky!"

Rob then whipped Larry backwards toward the wall, slamming his head into it.  A splatter of blood shot out in all directions as Larry now laid their limp.  The blow had fractured Larry's skull at the base, and he had begun to bleed out.

Everyone backed away from Rob and the now limp body of Larry.  Rob stood up slowly and stared all of them down, a menacing grin coming across his face.  Pat entered the room in the distance, stone faced as ever.  Rob took notice of him, almost acting surprised to see him.

Finally, Pat spoke.

"Rob, it's good to see you again."

Everyone turned and looked at Pat.  He knows this lunatic by name? thought Linda.

"Likewise", replied Rob.

"It's been a very long time", Pat said, finishing with his patented smile.